In many conversations with other mothers of college daughters, rushing a sorority is one of the topics that causes a lot of concern. According to one mother I spoke with her daughters’ experience caused her to be quite upset. The process of being eliminated from houses that she had hoped to belong to was very hurtful. At a time when these young women are dealing with so many changes, handling the rejection of this kind is quite difficult. Certainly if a girl does not get a bid it is quite upsetting. Damage control by the family kicks into high gear. Reminding this young woman that she is indeed wonderful and desirable becomes paramount. But even if there is a positive outcome and your daughter gets a bid, it makes you wonder about the process.
For those of us who have upper class college kids we can remember the first time our college student came home after being on their own for Thanksgiving break. For many of us it was an eye opening experience. Here was our baby who we had sent off not a mere 2-3 months ago. But after being on his or her own with no one looking over their shoulder sometimes the transition back to living under a parent’s roof was a little rocky. So here we are to caution you that things may be different with your college student when they return home and to be patient so the transition back home can be a smooth one.
As parents we have to remember that except for following some dorm rules our college kids are masters of their own schedule. They sleep when they want, go out when they want, eat when they want and the most important of all come in from a night out when they want. Also since college kids are usually on a whirlwind schedule, balancing studying and a social life many of us parents found that when our college kids came home the first thing they did was to to sleep and sleep they did; sometimes for the whole first day. I remember the first time my oldest came home for Thanksgiving break – he slept the whole first day away. There I was waiting to engage him and find out just how things were going at school and he was sleeping! I was frustrated – if only someone had told me that this might happen I would have been able to take a deep breath and not be so anxious